Week IV - Day 3 - The Cup Brimming Over

Typing the title I immediately thought of the 23rd Psalm.  Somewhere I have a great rewrite of this familiar psalm. Maybe, if I am lucky, I will run across it today. Until then, Selah has a great rewrite...

Amen...and amen!

I love the stories Joyce shares of her childhood.  Today, she remembers visiting great-aunt Ida when she was around four - five years old. Joyce says she looked forward to this visits because her aunt was both generous and kind.  I had some generous and kind great-aunts, but I think my mom was afraid of what my brother and I might break in the homes of our "greats."

Anyway...Joyce remembers a time when Great-Aunt Ida took her coin purse, unzipped it, and put all the pennies in her hand.

Small children still love
a handful of pennies!

"The bounty of those few pennies sent me into a tizzy of happiness." (Joyce Rupp, The Cup of Life, p 140)

Joyce compares her feeling as a child with a handful of pennies to the feeling she has today when she thinks about God's generosity toward her. She writes,

Yet, another poem that isn't Christian,
but still I believe points to
the God we worship.

"I am ever amazed at how God keeps on extending care and kindness to me no matter how I feel or think, no matter what mood I am in, no mater how loving or nasty I am. God keeps offering welcoming love and abiding peace to me...In a way, God's love is like having a "bottomless cup." I can drink and drink from the abundance of God and there is still more love to be poured into my heart." (Ibid)

I can almost see Joyce as she continues...it is like she is sitting here in my living room with me:

I think I used this once before, when I had no idea where to
begin or where to end on choosing a picture of this world.

"When I lean back and reflect upon the gifts I have in my life, I realize that the generosity of God is beyond my comprehension. Nothing I could ever do would "earn" all of these gifts that are freely and lavishly given. I marvel at the gift of my inner and outer life. I am astounded at the daily guidance I receive. I am in awe at the way the world works and at how the intricate human body restores and renews itself. I look at the universe and wonder who this Creator Power is to be so generous with colors, shapes, patterns, and designs. I remember people...and I know without a doubt...I have been touched by Divine Love." (Ibid)

It feels as though Joyce is bringing all the weeks, the many devotions, the many images...and pouring them all into my cup as I sit and listen...

Romans 5:5

"The scriptures often speak of the abundance of God. This divine love is described as being poured into our hearts (Rom 5:5). The book of Joel tells of God's Spirit being poured out on all humanity (Jl 2:28). The psalms use many images to proclaim the generosity of God's gifts. Our lives, too, are a testimony to the generosity of the Divine Giver. Today is a day to step inside the abundance of God and to enjoy what you find there." (Rupp, p 141)

Breathprayer:
Breathing in: Brimming over...
Breathing out: ...with your love


Reflection:

My cup, my life is full to brimming
with God's blessings and love.

Set your cup before you.
Pour water into it so that it fills tot he very brim, ready to wash over the edge.
Sit and ponder how full the cup is.
Close your eyes and picture God's love filling you.
Let your entire being receive this love.




Scripture: Psalm 36:5-9

Journaling:
My cup brims over when...
I have difficulty receiving God's abundance when...
Generous God,...

 My cup brims over when... I began to write, "When life is going well..." and that would be true.  When life seems to be behaving without huge surprises or large bumps throughout my day, I have the sense that my cup is brimming over with blessings.  Yet, in hindsight, I have been able to identify those times when my cup was brimming over during the dark and difficult times of my life...but in that moment, I did not recognize my cup was even able to hold love...hold blessings. All to often in those dark moments I felt broken beyond repair, angry, sad, and so very lonely.

I have difficulty receiving God's abundance when... So, my question this morning, what do I need to do now, when life is not that difficult, that will sustain me when it becomes dark.  Because, the reality is we do walk through dark valleys again and again and again...

Because I am a child of God does not mean I will not know hardship or pain.  It does not mean I will not have times of extreme sadness.  It does mean, that I can continue walking...walking through that dark valley and not be afraid.  That is what it means to be a child of God, but how do I prepare my heart for those times?

I had piled so many "good" things
in my heart, there was not room for God.

In the past I would have been seen as a "good" Christian woman.  I served as an elder and a clerk of session. I sang in the choir and taught Sunday School.  I led lessons for women's study groups and I baked meals for those in mourning or hurting.  I "did" all the things a good Christian is recognized as doing....I was being Martha of Bethany.  But, when I could no longer "do" when it was I who needed the help... I became a lost child.  I had ignored my Mary's heart for so long, she was not able to find her way through the clutter that had become my life.

some of the spiritual disciplines that
work for me, enrich my life.

The journaling, the time of quiet, the music, the readings....all these things are spiritual disciplines that work for me...I KNOW they work because when I faithfully practice them, I am more sane, I am wiser, I listen better,...I am able to "be" in my do-ing or even inability to do. I do not know why this is so difficult for me to accept.  Partly, it goes back to my EGO demon that projects an illusion of control and I buy into it! I know that an athlete, a musician, a surgeon...whatever it might be...if they do not practice daily...they loose the muscle, flexibility, the mental sharpness...The same is true for me. If I do not practice the disciplines that make my heart strong and focused, then life will be difficult, even when the sun is shining. But faithfully practicing then even in the darkness, because I have "memory" that comes only from daily intentional practice, I can walk through recognizing my cup is brimming over with God's love, grace, and mercy.

Generous God,...  There is a part of me that is a bit afraid as I near the end of this book. Journaling online has been a new experience...a good experience! Yet, Joyce's book has made it easy by the way it is laid out in short devotions.  God, I am stronger for these weeks spent with Joyce! I celebrate that new awareness and the disciplines that have taken root over these weeks, but...I don't know if I can maintain this on my own...of course I can't.  Again, that is my EGO demon...suggesting "I" can do something.  Lord, it is only by your grace and your Spirit that I continue on this path.  Help me to stay focused on you.  Help me to see you in the brightness of the sunlight and in the darkest gloom.  And God, that darkest gloom bit? When it comes, help me to be aware that I am walking through the dark valley AND that you are with me. Help me to also be aware that I am walking through the sunlight and that you are with me. God, help me to 'be."

Prayer:
Extravagant God, Generosity beyond comprehension, Bestower of all that I need, Thank you for the immensity of your kindness. Praise to you for the endless out-pouring of your love. My being proclaims your goodness. 


Today:
As I pour liquids of any kind into a cup, a glass, or a bowl, I will smile inside as I remember how generous God is in filling my life with blessings.


As a little girl, college coed, and young adult...I LOVED Ed Ames. While I struggle to pull out the images of him as Don Quixote at Starlight Musicals the music has never left my heart.  Imagine my delight when I discovered this video from a PBS special in 2008.  Plus the songs on this video - Try to Remember and My Cup Runneth Over. After listening to these, I did find The Impossible Dream...oh my does that song speak to my idealistic heart...and he does it so well.

Question to self...how would you live and walk through each day, being aware that God sings this life song to me each day....watching me...with my cup runneth over with love...

Ed Ames - My Cup Runneth Over and Try to Remember: 

Try to remember when life was so tender and love was an ember about to billow....

He sings of remembering "deep in December", yet my prayer is that I remember through the dark valleys so that I might remain faithful.

Many Blessings ~ Sandi

Week V - Day 5 - Pouring from the Cup

Whirling Dervishes of Sufism

I enjoy how Joyce pulls spiritual references from teachers of other faiths.  It is a reminder how connected and how similar we are in so many ways.  Today, she once again goes to Rumi, the 13th century Muslim poet who founded   the Mevlevi Order of dervishes, better known as the Whirling Dervishes of Sufism. Through a turning movement, body posturing, mental focus, and sound, the dervish achieves ecstasy through union with God.

Rumi, a man with a fascinating story said, "Anyone who gives anything to the Divine will find that it comes to them turned to gold."

Again, Joyce speaks to my heart...as though she has been watching me.

"MY carefully crafted timetable."

"Our lives are such that our deepest compassion and generosity often get masked by our frustration with schedules, calendars, and clocks...I find myself becoming closed and selfish.  Sometimes it takes a challenging or humbling moment to shake loose my tenacious hold on trying to get everything done on my carefully crafted timetable." (Joyce Rupp, The Cup of Life, p 123)

I was so touched by Joyce's story of receiving a tape from a blind woman. Seems after returning home from a three week absence, Joyce was overwhelmed by the amount of mail waiting for her attention.

Glad I've never had
grumbling moments!! 

"I moaned and groaned, thinking of all the time it would take me to open, process, and respond...in the pile...was an envelope with a cassette tape in it...I grouched and grumbled to myself for a day and then decided that I had better find out what was on that tape. I discovered it had been sent by a blind woman. It contained one of the most beautiful letters I have ever received. I was deeply humbled and very regretful of my initial response...I was only willing to pour out a thimblefull of my time and attention for someone else while God was offering me a bushel-basket of golden insights and reflections." (Rupp, p 124)

We are encouraged throughout scripture to be generous and loving.  We are assured that we can live from an attitude of abundance rather than the fear of scarcity. Jesus told his followers that if they were generous in their giving that the same measure of generosity would be returned.

"Their giving would be turned to gold. Compassion is like that. When we let compassion pour forth generously from us instead of holding back with meager giving, it can be a powerful experience. We often receive more than we give." (Ibid)

Today's reading follows a wonderful Maundy Thursday service last evening where I was once again reminded of Jesus' compassion and generosity.  Joyce asks that today, I reflect on my generosity AND on God's. Have I, she asks, had any life experiences when I hesitated or resisted giving and then, later realized how much I had received in return?

Breathprayer:
Breathing in:  I give to you...
Breathing out: ...You give to me

Giving - Receiving - Giving - Receiving

Reflection:
Hold the cup in your hands.
Look and see all the space it has for filling.
Visualize God pouring love into your heart.
Picture your heart filled with this love.
Bring to mind someone who is suffering.
Let the love within you go out to this person.
Picture your love poured out profusely, filling this person's whole being.
Sit in silence and be at peace.


Scripture: Luke 6:37-38
    ³⁷ “Do not judge, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn, and you will not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven. ³⁸ Give, and it will be given to you. A good measure, pressed down, shaken together and running over, will be poured into your lap. For with the measure you use, it will be measured to you."


Journaling:
When someone is compassionate toward me, I...
God turned my giving into gold when...
One of the situations in my life where I tend to hold back and not offer compassion is... because...


With last evening's service still on my heart, with the thoughts of several I hold within my prayer journal, as I walk into this Good Friday, a song by Third Day comes to mind, which I think I've used before, but it is one of my favorites...Cry Out to Jesus - Third Day

When someone is compassionate toward me, I...it depends upon who is compassionate to me. I have sat here for several minutes, watching the images on the Third Day video...and the truth is that I have a different inner response depending on who I see offering me compassion.  This little ah-ha has surprised me and I am not sure what to do with it.  I am feeling that this insight is not the answer Joyce would have been looking for...and while I am "feeling that thought"...I recognize the demon of expectations and/or judgement tempting my trembling heart away from healing, growing, wholeness.


The demons in scripture and in movies are often portrayed as noisy, ugly, and obvious.  My demons are much more subtle and cagey.  They sneak up on me, sometimes without my noticing. Nudging me away from a new insight or nudging to not investigate that opening in my heart Light is shining through.

Cry Out To Jesus - Third Day

And to all of the people with burdens and pains
Keepin' you back from your life
You believe that there's nothing
And there is no one who can make it right

There is hope for the helpless, rest for the weary
And love for the broken hearts
There is grace and forgiveness, mercy and healing
He'll meet you wherever you are

Cry out to Jesus - Cry out to Jesus



I am on my fifth week of this reading and journaling...Lent is nearly over.  On this Good Friday morning the insights, the writing, the images, the songs...I remember:

• How interconnected we ALL are! I am as connected to a beggar on the streets as I am to an individual at my church as I am connected to someone who lives a lavish lifestyle.  I am connected to a stranger just as I connected to someone I know.  That when ANY of these people show me compassion, it is Jesus working through them to "meet me wherever I am."
• Barbara Streisand  sings There Are Lessons To Be Learned. "We start to doubt..."
• That I am not in control. 
• That Jesus provides lessons and gifts through the voice and hands of others...not just me....but others!
• That compassion runs both directions.  A Gift is to be GIVEN and RECEIVED.

When someone is compassionate toward me, I... I can look into the face of the one offering me compassion and see the face of Christ...and be glad!!! I can receive the gift of compassion with the same generous heart in which it was given.  Just as I can receive the gift of compassion that Jesus offers on this Good Friday...I can receive it in praise and in the love in which it was so generously offered rather than feeling guilty, rather than demanding why, rather than trying to give a logical explanation...I can receive this gift and I can can receive future gifts of compassion ...and see the face of Christ and be glad! Praise God!

I can see Christ in the homeless man
who offered to pray for me.

I can see Christ in the
woman in the checkout line.

With this insight, I can appreciate that there have been times when God turned my giving into gold when... when someone I was to be giving to, ended up blessing me.  Or someone who was younger, someone who was struggling, someone I didn't know...or someone I am not comfortable with...have given to me.  I let those sneaky demons enter my heart, creating a feeling of guilt, suspicion, anxiety...and I missed the gold that was mine for the taking.

I can receive Christ in the
smallest, not realizing they
have a GIFT to give me.

O, my Lord! Open me today to receive as well as give from your heart of generous compassion.  Help me to see your face, where I least expect...and to be thankful for that moment...for that opportunity to give to you AND to receive.  Yes, in today's world, sadly we do have to be cautious.  Yet, you told your disciples, ¹⁶ “I am sending you out like sheep among wolves. Therefore be as shrewd as snakes and as innocent as doves." (Matthew 10:16) 

I can see Christ in the woman with
cancer and RECEIVE a gift from her.

Perhaps our fears are nothing new...they have been around for centuries, just with different faces and called different names.

Some of my fears stem from the demons that demand I feed my EGO.  That EGO that wants to appear to be smart, in charge, sure of self, the "go to person".... Some of my fears stem from thinking I am not doing what I should for someone...they are the needy one!  Again, that EGO demon subtly working on my heart...preventing the light of Christ to shine forth as it can when "I" get out of his way.

So many lessons yet to be learned...yet as Barbara sang, there is no right/wrong...just lessons to be learned. 

Prayer:

O God, you turn my meager offerings into golden treasures. Let me not be hesitant when you ask for my love in the form of compassion. You are so abundant in your compassion to me. May I be as generous with others. May the measure of compassion I give be the measure of compassion returned to me. AMEN.

Today:

I will pour generously from my cup of love and kindness today.

Many images to carry in my heart today.  A few more...Give Me Jesus

Many Blessings ~ Sandi