It Takes Practice

It's hard to think that the insulting ordinariness of this truly teaches the full mystery of the all most important, eucharisteo. It's so frustratingly common - it's offensive. ~ AnnVoskamp

Drew's family is proud of his accomplishments of learning to play the piano.  I remember painstakingly playing Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star.  All the while yearning to play a much more complicated concerto!

It takes practice to learn anything!

From learning to speak, to write, ride a bike, play the piano.... It takes practice to learn to be still and centered before God.  And all the while I yearn to be like the great spiritual teachers.

Some days I coax hard. I am tired. I don't know if it's the way the oney light runs down the walls and sticks to all the dust lying still on every surface, or if a fog films over the eyes, or if I am plain deceived...I try taking up eucharisteo because I have known it before, that joy-miracle that might happen even now and here.  (Ann Voskamp, One Thousand Gifts, p 54)

Like Ann, I do feel happy when I pause to notice (I"m still not writing...pausing, but not writing.)

I do feel that. Happy when I name. But the porridge pot soaks in the sink and I don't know. How much is my tongue, tail of the heart, learning the real language of eucharisteo? I forget Eden and naming and nails, and it all seems just a bit...juvenile. (Voskamp, p 55)

Oh, does this resonate with my heathen heart.

Honestly, I don't want to learn anything at the moment! I just want to "be"! I want to be like the saints I read and study! I want to be able to express their hard language of faith! I want to be able to fluently speak the language of thanksgiving!

Like Ann writes, I want the very fullest life...and I want it now!

I want it without the work and practice.

As I began this post sharing:  It's so frustratingly common that it is almost offensive... 

Driving nails into a life always is. (Ibid)

Paul said it twice that even he had to learn.  And like anything else, learning takes practice.  C.S. Lewis wrote: If you think of this world as a place intended simply for our happiness, you find it quite intolerable: think of it as a place of training and correction and it's not so bad.


What I appreciate so much about Ann is her honesty.

This is why I had never really learned the language of "thanks in all things!" Though pastors preached it, I still came home and griped on. I had never PRACTICED. Practiced until it became the second nature, the first skin. (Ibid)

This morning Sarah Young soothed my frazzled heart as I read her devotion in Jesus Calling:

Do not be discouraged by the difficulty of keeping your focus on Me. I know that your heart's desire is to be aware of My Presence continually. This is a lofty goal: you aim toward it but never fully achieve it in this life. Don't let feelings of failure weigh you down. Instead, try to see yourself as I see you. First of all, I am delighted by your deep desire to walk closely with Me through your life. I am pleased each time you initiate communication with Me. In addition, I notice the progress you have made since you first resolved to live in My Presence...Rejoice in these tiny triumphs, and they wil increasingly light up your days.

I needed this reassurance this morning.

I am tired.  I have a full plate.  And....I just do not want to pick up a pen and begin practicing!

Practice must be the most difficult thing when it comes to learning, yet I know (in my head) that this practice...this training is the very essence of transformation.  Ann concludes this portion by writing:

Practice, practice, practice. Hammer. Hammer. Hammer

Lord, you know my heart.  You know my fatigue.  You know I am resisting having to PRACTICE!!  Like a child, I do not want to commit to working on/practicing on that which can save my life. This fatigue is my Giant and through the story of David, I know you are here with me....in the midst... I am grateful to be reminded that you love me and that you celebrate that at least I yearn!! : ) Praise be to God!

Many Blessings ~ Sandi